It has long been thought that the toughest part for a man in the whole wedding process was popping the question. Ring, yes and done. Time to sit back and let the wedding planning fall to the bride. Not so fast there, guys! Grooms today are taking a bigger interest in the planning of their nuptials. One day you’ll be telling your kids and grandkids about the day you married your wife. Make sure that it has your personal stamp on it. With a few guided tips, you’ll be making your mark on your big day.
Party of Two, Please
Gentlemen, be present! Meet the caterer. Chat with potential DJs. Be a part of the planning process. The reason many brides ultimately take over the planning is because they can! Many grooms participate only in conversations involving the budget and maybe the bar. It’s not always realistic to expect the groom to invest as much time as the bride does, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have to invest any. The more involved you are, the easier it will be for your soon-to-be Mrs. to appreciate your input.
Free to Be You
The assumption that most men really don’t care about their wedding day isn’t always true. In reality most probably haven’t daydreamed and played dress-up like their fiancées have, but there is a pretty fair chance they’ve thought about the big day. Your opinion allows you to add those touches that define who you are as well.
Consider the favors that often appear as name cards or at place settings. I once attended at wedding where the groom was Canadian. The table assignments were accompanied by a small bottle shaped like a maple leaf filled with Canadian maple syrup! Perhaps a favorite cocktail or dessert can add a bit of “groom” to the reception. That little touch lets the groom’s style shine through! It’s fine if you have one aspect or 10 that you really care about. As you meet with the vendors, if you have a preference or idea, speak up.
Ah, the dreaded tuxedo debate. Many grooms find that although the tux is the traditional look of choice for the ceremony, it’s just “not them.” Believe it or not, there is truly no law that dictates you must wear a tux. Consider chilling out a tad to release some stress of the wedding day style. Go beyond the bow tie. Today we’re seeing tuxedos with long ties instead of the bow tie and with vests instead of cummerbunds.
If you’re having a casual affair, a great look is to have your party wear khaki pants, ask them to all get the same navy blazer and pull in a wedding color with a pocket square or printed tie, with the groom picking a different variation. Just as your bride will express her individual fashion flair, it’s your day to also show off your style.
You’ve Got This
Not all planning needs to be a joint effort. Take on one or two elements alone. The perfect opportunity for planning flying solo is the honeymoon! By etiquette standards it’s technically the groom’s responsibility. Consider destinations that have been bucket list dreams of your new bride and surprise her with limited details. Maybe look to a unique adventure you have both dreamed of experiencing. All-inclusive resorts leave the hassle aside and allow you to enjoy your experience fully without fiscal fuss.
Also, look to buy her a wonderful wedding gift. Give something that expresses to her that you’re looking forward to your future as much as she is. A delivery of beautiful flowers the morning of the wedding with a sweet note is sure to start her day with a smile and maybe calm those jittery bridal nerves.
Finally, the task of planning the perfect big day can be beyond daunting. Stress runs high and nerves can be frazzled. After all, it is the most important day of both your lives. Even if you offer to be involved, you may still have a bride who insists on doing the majority of the planning herself. If your true love seems to be falling victim to bridal burnout, give her a break. Give her a night to relax: Cook her dinner, do the dishes, rent her favorite movie and remind her why wedding planning is worth all the stress. Sometimes those little sweet gestures are the perfect amount of help your true love needs!